Acceptance.

There are days that drag. There are days that I’m stuck in my thoughts. There are days that look dark through the lense that I’m looking through. On these days I think I don’t want to do anything. I think that life is hard. The sensations I feel in my body are overwhelming. I struggled to accept these days.

It’s easy to accept the days when it’s easy to connect with my creative energy. It’s easy to accept the days where I feel hydrated and full and joyful and happy. It’s another to live through and show up on days that are darker. Accept the sensations in the body, accept how I feel, accept what is there.

I used to judge the days - the days where nothing seemed to work as dark or tough days and the days that were joyous and flowed and easy as good days. This judging was not helpful. I needed to unlearn how to do this. Well actually I started to learn how to notice what was happening in me and around me in the moment. I started to notice how this shifted and changed all day long. In other words, I cultivated more awareness of self.

I catch myself judging and comparing. Two thought patterns that aren’t specifically helpful for anything related to life, especially when dealing with pain. Now when I catch myself in that, I hear them and I notice they’re there, and I let them be there. Sometimes the thoughts are really loud and I get lost in them. Other moments they’re just there and I keep focused on what’s in front of me.

Accepting whatever shows up inside of me or outside of me as something that is happening and acknowledging that it doesn’t last forever and noticing when it shifts, has changed the way I approach life and has brought in so much space for me to evolve, focus on what’s important to me and appreciate the moment for what it is.